the Unexpressed Advantage

The other day I sauntered upstairs and found myself plopped down on a couch watching the movie "Hope Floats" with Beth.

Eventually everyone else did the same thing. There we were, once again (see also, Dirty Dancing, and Steel Magnolias) watching a chick flick as a house. I've always wanted to see "Hope Floats". And by "always wanted to see" I mean, "passed it for the last 10 years at the video store and never rented it."

But there it was, And so I watched. This is what I learned:

1. Coming into the movie "Hope Floats" 45 minutes after it starts with only a brief update as to what's going on is sufficient to enjoy it.
2. There's a kid named Travis in the movie who inexplicably is in some sort of giant animal costume in every scene he's in.
3. Women think Harry Connick Jr. is attractive, even when he's NOT playing the piano.
4. Taxidermy, in any context, is creepy.
5. The best method of seduction is "touching" and "rubbing"; avoid "talking" at all costs.
6. The girl from "Little Miss Sunshine" is the reincarnate form of several different child actors, including the girl in "hope floats" and Shirley Temple, and that kid from "Home Alone".
7. We've come a long way in regard to jeans. A long way.
8. At this point in history, I'm pretty sure that TV is better than Movies.
9. In any situation, whenever a woman is saying something that is contrary to your particular goals, desires, or intent, simply saying "Shhhhhh" is the best argument.

1. Nobody really cares about Travis.